O que te faz feliz?

Quando tinha quinze anos, conheci uma banda de música chamada Candlebox. Eles tem uma mistura única de heavy metal com blues. Pensei que dava pra escrever ouvindo as músicas deles, mas... Não dá pra prestar atenção em mais nada.

Nunca nenhuma namorada gostou deles (ciúme?). O vocalista não é mulher, mas tem um agudo de quebrar vidraças, e um grito de dar dor de ouvido (os dos outros). Cada música tem uma melodia diferente, única – mas é sempre o mesmo vocalista, o que as torna uma grande família de letras que invadem minha cabeça e meu coração.

Eles não são daquelas bandas que saem por aí se embebedando, se drogando e fazendo besteiras. Na verdade até fizeram uma música repudiando drogas. Surgiram em Seattle em 1991, quase no mesmo cenário que Nirvana, Alice In Chains e Pearl Jam, só que um pouco mais “nova”.

A verdade é que as suas músicas me acompanharam por muito tempo de minha história. Fizeram três discos, mas em 1999 eles terminaram a banca e cada um seguiu seu destino num ambiente underground demais pra que eu conseguisse sequer uma mp3 das suas novas bandas. Aí vai uma lista das músicas mais marcantes para quem quiser conhecer:

Candlebox:
- Don’t You
- You
- Far Behind
- Rain
- Cover Me

Lucy:
- Simple Lessons
- Drowned
- Become (to tell)
- BUtterfly
- It’s Amazing
- Bothered
- Understanding

Happy Pills:
- 10,000 Horses
- A Stone's Throw Away
- Breakaway
- It's Alright
- Sometimes

Quando a banda terminou, eu fiquei muito triste. Não haveria músicas novas do Candlebox. Uns meses atrás entrei no site deles, depois de muito tempo sem fazer isso – e para minha surpresa – eles estavam de volta! Fizeram um álbum de um show ao vivo, e em 2008 fizeram outro só com músicas inéditas. Fiquei muito feliz, o novo álbum é perfeito!

Into the Sun
- Stand
- Surrendering
- Into The Sun
- Miss You
- How Does It Feel*
- A Kiss Before Me
- Breathe Me In* - Intro
- Breathe Me In*
- Lover (Come Back To Me)

* Estado de Perfeição da Arte



You came out of nowhere, and our eyes collide
Like a wall collapsing, a crushing tide
And I saw you laughing, and I saw your smile
It made me anxious baby, it made me high
You ask I answer no, that seat's been removed
You're a deep-rooted tree, an artist's muse
I watch you listen, and I watch you share
You make me want more
And you make me scared
You're so much more than I'd ever hoped

So won't you breathe
Oh won't you breathe
Breathe me in
So I am whole

Oh won't you breathe
Oh won't you breathe
Breathe me in
So I am whole

We're miles from home, we're one another's tribe
An autumn season in a summer's time
And I watch you circle
And baby I watch you fall
You make me feel what I thought
I could never feel at all
And you're so much more
Than I'd ever hoped

So won't you breathe
Oh won't you breathe
Breathe me in
So I am whole
Oh won't you breathe
Oh won't you breathe
Breathe me in
So I am whole

Let it out, let it go, ok to breathe
Let it out, let it go, ok
So much more than
Oh, let it out let it go ok to breathe
Let it out let it go ok
So much more than

So much more than I had ever hoped
So much more than I had ever
So much more than I had ever
So much more than I had ever hoped
Oh won't you breathe me in
Oh won't you breathe me in
Oh won't you breathe me in
Oh won't you breathe me in

/ Breathe Me In



All, all it's not alright
Your role it played through time
Come and rescue me
you're needed here at home

And your space, a moment in time
A hand to hold a hand I tried
Who was it called to you?
Who called?
Your story's alive with hellos and goodbyes
Bright lights, first kiss and drunken nights
How I miss you

I miss you now and hey
And I can't wait another day
And hey, that crooked smile upon your face
Oh, they'll never get old
all the stories you told
From the beach to the ring
to the songs of your soul
How I miss you
I miss you now and hey

And the rain
Falling cold outside
Covered me the day you died
You could have waited one more day
I should've called
I dream of your life, the war and the fight
The music you played, the love for your wife
And I miss you

I miss you now and
Hey, I can't wait another day
And hey, that crooked smile upon your face
Oh, they'll never get old
all the stories you told
From the beach to the ring
to the songs of your soul
How I miss you
And I miss you
I miss you now and hey

And I am mad at the age
That stole you away
By surviving the beach
You gave me my stay
And I understand by this that I am
All that you were was changed by the sand
but I miss you

I miss you now and
Hey, I can't wait another day
And hey, that crooked smile upon your face
Oh, they'll never get old
all the stories you told
From the beach to the ring
to the songs of your soul
How I miss you
How I miss you

/ I Miss You (para meu Irmão, Daniel)



Did i feel this way back then?
Did you wake up
to the sound of pouring rain?
fading days of blue rush past your eyes
Would you lose yourself
in someone else's vain?
or should you shout your mind out
when the loss began?
Bring it on!
high until you washed it all away
it's all the same
i realized it through this song
i sing out loud and call your name
do you feel i'm only someone
you could never ever know?
in it all you'll find
you see you're not that far from me
so walk and hold your head up high
a stone's throw away
I feel right now like i felt way back then
the center of my life i lost it all
Never ever knew how much i'd loved
until you left, you're gone
fell right now like i was chasing you
the same way
High until you washed it all away
it's all the same
i realized it through this song
sing out loud and call your name
do you feel the only someone
you could never ever know?
in it all you find
you see you're not that far from me
to walk and hold your head up high
a stone's throw away
I would like this stone to roll!
High until i washed it all away
it's all the same
i realized it through this song
sing out loud and call my name
do you feel the only someone
you could never ever know
in it all you find
you see you're not that far from me
to walk and hold your head up high
a stone's throw away
You're just a stone's throw away
never knew how much i'd loved
until you're gone
never knew how much i'd love
until you're gone away
until you’re gone away
until you’re gone away
until you’re gone away
Feel right now like i felt way back then
the center of my life i lost it, lost it all away
lost it all away
lost it all away
lost it all away
lost it all away
lost it all away
Never knew how much i'd loved
until you're gone
never knew how much i'd loved
until you're gone
never knew how much i'd loved
until you're gone
never knew how much i'd loved
until you're gone away
until you're gone away
until you’re gone away
until you’re gone away
until you’re gone away
a stone's throw away
a stone's throw away
a stone's throw away
a stone's throw away
a stone's throw away…

/ A Stone's Throw Away (para meu Irmão, Daniel)



I just want to thank you
For all that you've done
The mess you've made
Your allegations
I don't want to blame you
But I need to crackdown
You're essential to the process
And the essence of my breakdown

I can't wait to sell you, to the village of fools
You're a violent hangover, malicious, so cruel
Could you keep it secret?
You couldn't lock it up tight
You're a sea of information

That's spilling out from all sides
I think I might find you
A little clumsy and aloof
Atop a mountain of sand
Unhinged in untruths

How does it feel, upon your throne?
How does it feel, to be all alone?
How does it feel, to crawl so low?
You're the king of nothing, you're just a show
How does it feel?

I will give you no words
Yes, I choose a mute stance
It's hard enough to engage
The smart as well as the ass
You couldn't keep it secret
You couldn't lock it up tight
Cause you're a sea of information
That's bleeding out of the lies

How does it feel, upon your throne?
How does it feel, to be all alone?
How does it feel, to crawl so low?
You're the king of nothing, you're just a show
How does it feel?

One might deceive, one might align
One more disease, yeah, the great divide!
How does it feel, to be on your own?
You are the seed, welcome to the show

Welcome to the show
Welcome to the show
Welcome to the show
Welcome to the show
How does it feel?
Welcome to the show
How does it feel?

/ How Does it Feel

Geração Arroba

“Não se julga um bom livro pelo seu perfil no Orkut”
Não era esse o ditado?

Tinha uma garota no Orkut, que de tão linda parecia a Natalie Portman, que fez aqueles filmes novos de "Star Wars", e também aquele file chamado "Closer, Perto Demais". Ela é baixinha, magra, e dona de um rosto perfeito. Seu jeito e seu sorriso nas fotos sugerem uma garota meiga e tímida.

Acontece que faz mais de um ano que eu vi o seu perfil no Orkut. E por esses dias, olhando os perfis de amigos dos amigos dos amigos, acabei chegando sem querer no seu perfil novamente. A foto no perfil era a mesma. Mas o álbum tinha sido atualizado. De repente aquela garota angelical mostrou-se outra pessoa. Ela ganhou peso, maquiagem carregada, e suas fotos já não eram tão inocentes... Somente fotos em bares, boates, e comentários sobre cigarros mistos, mentolados e sei mais o que...

Será que este é um exemplo de como as aparências enganam? Quem sabe ela esteja apenas em uma época entre safras... Já notaram que as mulheres, logo que ficam solteiras, só pensam em sair pra "dançar", curtir a noite, etc. Como se estivessem presas e impedidas de seguirem seu instinto animal... Bom, talvez eu esteja sendo muito exigente e careta. Talvez seja outra coisa...

A verdade é que ser solteiro tem suas vantagens e desvantagens, e o outro lado também. Cada pessoa tem o direito de escolher se vai gastar seu tempo livre com viagens, cursos, livros, ou em baladas, procurando um novo par ou simplesmente testando bocas até achar a que melhor lhe agrada...

Sei que esta garota, que de tão bela, me incentivou a refletir sobre isso, posto que nunca me imaginei namorando com descendente de libaneses nem nada muito perto, tirando aquele incidente em 2006. Temo cada vez mais, estar cem por cento certo sobre o que acontece com as mulheres jovens e bonitas dessa terra, que crescem sem o seio da família, e sem uma educação esclarecedora – ou pior: sem amizades construtivas e só o contrário. Até agora tenho acertado em todas as minhas deduções sobre elas.

A verdade é que minha geração nasceu pouco antes de uma revolução humana, e tolera bem, mas não totalmente, as mudanças radicais que esta causou na sociedade, no modo de pensar e agir das pessoas que vieram depois de nós, a geração coca-cola versus a geração @.